tq98: Does the feedback you give say more about you than the receiver?
Your Friday Trigger Question
Year-end seems to be the time when many bosses give formal feedback. This annual ritual often says more about the giver than about the receiver.
Consider timing. An annual performance review shows that your boss does not really expect you to improve. Does being told today what you should have done better earlier in the year leave you with time enough to still earn that carroty bonus? I think not. And neither does Santa.
Consider expectations. We often sense how others expect us to behave and unwittingly behave accordingly. Can you honestly say that you don't sometimes mirror how your boss treats you? Which is why your jolly fat expectation comes with a catch. (Of course, Eliza Doolittle explains it so much better. See below.)
Consider style. Style can influence content effectiveness. The way you give feedback (style) often has a bigger impact than the feedback itself (content). Not so much what, much more how. For example, did you aim to fix the past or influence the future?
If you find me too wordy, or if you prefer simple sound bites, then heed The Beatles: In the end the feedback you get is equal to the feedback you give. (In style and in content.)
Your Friday Trigger Question:
Does the feedback you give say more about you than about the receiver?
Welcome to my side of the
nonsense feedback divide.
If you don't know who Eliza Doolittle is (really?), she is the flower girl in George Bernard Shaw's play Pygmalion, and in the movie My Fair Lady. Here's how she explains "behavior expectations" to Colonel Pickering: The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she is treated. I shall always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me as a flower girl, and always will; but I know I can be a lady to you, because you always treat me as a lady, and always will.
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